Careful
by Raven16
Summary: Scully's reflections during the end of "Existence," the season finale. Spoilers and shipper-ness galore. VERY UPDATED, as of 5/22/01. Better dialogue.


Summary: Scully's reflections during the end of "Existence," the season finale. Spoilers and shipper-ness galore. VERY UPDATED, as of 5/22/01.  
Archive: Please, but tell me where so I can visit.  
Spoilers: Existence, Season 8.  
Warnings: No Noromos, some MSR. LOTS OF SPOILERS IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE FINALE.  
Rating: PG  
Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully and William aren't mine. The X-files isn't mine. They're Chris Carter's. Nothing's mine but this story, copyright 2001 Raven. Don't take it without my permission.  
  
Note: I DO NOT for the life of me remember the dialogue that was passed between M and S during the end, so I tried my best. Sorry! Don't flame me! Bad memory! I'm not Mulder!  
WHO ELSE thought that was a perfect ending to the season????? A healthy baby, happy Scully, and A KISS!!!! A rare and beautiful LIP KISS!!! That kicked ass! I was ecstatic after it ended. My dad was looking at me funny.  
Forgive the bad writing. I wrote it IMMEDIATELY after the finale ended. I've still got an hour before the first season reruns come on Fox at eleven-thirty. ^.^  
I apologize to all who were angry with me for putting spoilers in my summary. I changed the summary. It was eleven o' clock at the time, I wasn't thinking! I really am sorry.  
  
I also apologize to Cleo, who doesn't like my writing.. apparently. Cleo, I know I have no right to imitate Mulder or Scully, but if you're angry at me for trying, you'd probably be angry with all the other writers who've tried as well. I'm sorry you don't like me or my stories, but I like to write... please let me do it in peace.   
  
*Talk To Me.* About my stories, about the finale, about shipperness, whatever! Poisonlollypop@aol.com  
  
~~~~~~~  
"If those are my last words, I can do better."  
  
~Mulder  
~~~~~~~  
May 20, 2001  
  
~~~~~~~~  
Careful  
by Raven  
~~~~~~~~  
  
There are so many words that could describe what I'm feeling. Relief, gratitude, pure and utter joy. Thousands of emotions are jumbled inside me, moving and combining and exploding like fireworks in my stomach. The same stomach that, for nine months, harbored a miracle that no one could truly explain.  
  
I smile fondly down at little William as Mulder holds him, clutching him to his chest. Careful. Always careful. He appears to believe William is a china doll, small and delicate. My precious baby. Our baby, really. Mulder was there for me as much as he could be during my pregnancy. And now that I have a child of my own, I know he'll still be there. Watching over me.  
  
He grins at William's crossed-eyed expression and then turns to look at me. I look back, never bothering with any barriers to hide what I feel. What would the use be, now that it's over? I know he can see the battling emotions in my eyes as I take a breath and speak.   
  
"I fear the truth." My voice comes out soft and timid, like a child beaten one too many times by someone he loves. "About how... and why." The tears well up without my permission, but I blink them back quickly. "And I know you fear it, too."  
  
"I think what we fear are the possibilities," he says, moving his gaze from William to me. His voice betrays so many feelings I can't sort out one from the other. "The truth we both know." He's staring right into me, his deep hazel eyes penetrating my very skin to gaze into my heart.   
  
I attempt to smile, looking down at William once more for reassurance. Beautiful happiness washes over me as I see his confused face, wondering who we are, completely unaware that he'd come so close to being taken from his mother. Pure innocence. May he keep it as long as he can.  
  
Turning my gaze back to Mulder, I ask, "Which is what?" I can hear how defeated my words sound. I don't really expect a straight answer. Not now, at least.   
  
Instead of even speaking, he simply leans forward and presses his lips against mine. Kissing me, really kissing me, long and deep, with no bees or Nazis or awkward moments to stop him. Passionate. But careful. Always careful. I kiss him back softly, with the same amount of longing. I can feel every unspoken word flowing into me, undying devotion and endearment and love. What kind of love, I cannot say. Maybe time will tell.  
  
I almost see the doors closing. An end to another episode of our lives. The lights seem to dim and still he kisses me, cradling my son between us. My hands find his neck and rest there, relishing the feel of his warm skin against my suddenly clammy palms. Can a moment last forever? Can you keep it for another time? If so, I want to capture this one and put it in a bottle and bring it out to look at during all the bad times I know will come. They always do.  
  
Mulder will be here. And so will I. We'll parent this child together, allowing William a father figure in his life and someone to look up to. The future is misty, but at least some things have solid foundation. The bad times will come and fall inevitably upon us. There's no avoiding them.  
  
But we'll be careful. And together, I know we will see things through.   
  
  
~~~  
FIN  
~~~  
  
*ShIpPeRs 4eVeR!*  
  
Even if you didn't like the story, I'm gonna need some XF discussion to get me through these summer reruns... ugh... What do guys think'll happen in the next season? I, for one, don't know what to expect. I guess we'll see when we get there. Shipperholics club to survive the summer, write fanfics, you guys! Write, write, write!  
  
^.^ ~Raven  
  
  



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